Everyone wants to be respected. As I see it there are two different kinds of respect: Forced and voluntary. Forced respect comes in a couple of forms, as well. First, there's rudimentary respect. That's the respect your followers owe you as a human being. Second, there's regulatory respect, which is the respect your followers must show to you in accordance with regulations. Voluntary respect is the kind of respect you earn from your followers which makes them want to follow you. Obviously, as a leader, the voluntary respect of your followers is crucial. Let's look at a few ways of earning that respect, based on the leadership style of Marine Corps legend LtGen Lewis B. "Chesty" Puller.
1. Treat your followers with respect. Sound simple? Well, it is. Respect is a two-way street. You can order your followers to show you customs and courtesies, but you cannot demand voluntary respect. As a young Lieutenant, Chesty commanded the Marine Corps Silent Drill Team. It had been years since the Marine Corps had won an inter-service drill competition. Private Bob Norrish, a member of the team, had an interesting observation to share: "Yet, somehow, though he was hard as nails, he could be friendly with us like no officer we'd ever seen. We gave him all we had." Think about those two sentences for a moment. Chesty made a distinction between discipline and kindness, and his Marines noticed it. He worked them hard -- real hard. But he was still kind to them. Because of that, his Marines were willing to work hard out of respect for their Commander.
2. Make it obvious to your followers that you care about them. Just like everyone wants to be respected, everyone wants to feel like they are important. It's just part of our nature as human beings. Chesty refused any kind of special treatment based on his status. Private Gerald White wrote in his diary, "Puller must have marched twice the distance we did, for all day long he kept marching up and down the column... Many times today I saw him take a BAR, machine gun or mortar off the shoulder of some Marine whose fanny was dragging and carry it to give the poor guy some respite." At the time of this story, Puller was a Major. Did he have to do any of this? No way! I wish more of the C/MSgts and C/2d Lts I know would "stoop to the level" of the C/Amn serving under them like Chesty did with his Privates.
3. Exceed the standards you hold your followers to. In his Cadet First Sergeant's Guide, Capt Shawn Stanford says that the Shirt should, in a nutshell, constantly try to outdo her Cadets.(ed note: Capt Stanford is in Marine heaven being mentioned in the same paragraph as Chesty Puller.) I believe this applies to all leaders. If your followers are sweatin' it out in the sun at an air show, their respect for you will shoot through the roof if you're out there with them instead of hanging while other leaders sitting in the shade goofing off and drinking all the water in the AO. A young officer once said to Chesty, "But Colonel, you expose yourself like a private, and you're the most valuable man in the outfit." The response? "No officer's life is worth more than that of any man in his ranks. He may have more effect on the fighting, but if he does his duty, so far as I can see, he must be up front to see what is actually going on with his troops. They'd find a replacement for me soon enough if I got hit. I've never yet seen a Marine outfit fall apart for lack of any one man." He was a legend, and he was humble enough to do his job right. He wasn't like other officers of like rank and position. He wanted his Marines to be courageous in the line of fire, so he modeled it for them. For further proof: according to Leadership 2000 and Beyond Vol. 1, Chapter 4, it says that leadership is learned by the demonstration-performance teaching technique. Basically, monkey see, monkey do. If you tell your followers to do one thing, and then do the opposite, why should they follow you? Double standards are unfair and just plan stupid. If you're fair in your standards, your followers will have a reason to respect you.
4. Be fair in how you treat your followers. When Chesty was a major, he once came upon an interesting scene: a private was standing at Attention, saluting over and over, as a young Butter Bar stood in front of him. Chesty walked up and addressed the El Tee. "What's going on, Old Man?" "This Marine, Sir. He neglected to salute me as we passed, and I've ordered him to salute one hundred times." Chesty said, "You're right, Lieutenant. So right. But you know that an officer must return every salute he receives -- now let me see you get to it, and do your share." He stood nearby for a while to monitor the whole thing. Word got around the outfit real quick, and the enlisted Marines loved him for it.
The goal of any leader should be to perform the mission in the most effective manner. Respect is crucial to good leadership. If your followers do not respect you, they will only follow you because they feel obligated to do so. Because of this, they'll do the bear minimum to get the job done. If your followers respect you, they'll find motivation to strive for excellence in the fact that they don't want to let you down. You must earn the voluntary respect of your followers in order to effective as a leader, and in order for your unit to be effective as a team.