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May 2010 |
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Crossing Into the Blue: Cadence, Coffee, and ClichesCadet Alyse Zadalis |
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"National Blue Beret (nàsh´e-nel bloo be-rá´) n. CAP English, 1966. 1) Special Activity held every year during the EAA AirVenture, at Whitman Field, Oshkosh, Wisconsin. 2) A great way to see one of the largest airshows in the world up close and very, very, very personal. 3) The best darn National Cadet Special Activity that a cadet could go to." -Capt. Z’s Dictionary of the Modern English Language  So, you all know what National Blue Beret (NBB from here on out) is, right? Major airshow, propellers everywhere, row after row of Port-O-Johns... No, really, it's a great activity! Where else do you get to legally stand on an active taxi-way and sip lemonade as you munch a ham sandwich and marshal a never-ending stream of aircraft? I’d say no where...
Where else do you get to do doughnuts through puddles of mud on a golf cart, and fear no reprimand? Er, wait, I meant to say, where else do you DF on a golf cart amongst some of the coolest airplanes in the world? Again, nowhere... Those are just a couple of the bazillions of CAP/Aviation/just plain cool things that you get to try your hand at! "I’m a steamroller baby! And I’m rollin’ on down the line!"Picture a sidewalk in New York City. Now take away about seventy five percent of the people, add a few hundred motorized scooters, throw in some screaming children for effect, and poof!: you have one of the countless public areas at the EAA AirVenture. Now, if your squadron has trouble marching through an empty parking lot at the weekly meeting, imagine trying to maneuver through this mess while keeping your wits about you, still looking sexy in your BDU’s. Sounds tough, huh? Well, you’re right. It is. But, you can overcome! And, like a phoenix rising from the ashes, so too can you beat the odds! And all you have to know is the first letter in the word "cat." (Hint: It's "C"...)  That letter doesn’t just stand for cookie at NBB (Although, the ones that Operation Thirst hands out can brighten even the most stressful day.) No, I’m sorry Cookie Monster, "C" is for Cadence - jodies - marching songs - Whatever you call them, and they’re important at Oshkosh. If you can get a voice that projects twenty feet, your flight is in great shape. When people hear you coming, the crowd will part like your daddy’s comb-over. Yeah, they’ll stare at you, some will take pictures, and a few may go so far as to break out the video camera; but you get to like the idea of lookin’ good for a stranger’s home movies after a while."Oh, you better get outta my way now! 'Fore I march all over you!"All right, are you ready for more acronyms containing only the letter "C"? Well, you better be... "C.C." doesn’t stand for Customs and Courtesies anymore (Though, you better observe them, or you will be restricted to the compound, and they don’t feed you the premium kibble there...) "C.C." is for Crowd Control! It was the bane of my existence at Blue Beret, and yet, I choose to devote several paragraphs to it. Go figure. Your job is to keep people out of restricted areas, like the very active taxi ways. So your Flight Commander tells you to get out your yellow nylon rope, stretch it out on the ground, and space yourselves about twenty feet apart along the line that you create. So you do that, and you stand there... And you stand there... And you stand some more... And then little longer, until, as if by magic, a bystander decides that he wants a close up of the taxiing MIG fighter and tries to cross the line you have been so assiduously guarding. ('assiduously' is a Big Word which means "Without peeing your pants'. - Ed.) What do I do? Can I stop him? Will he think I look like a dork with my colorful patches on these sexy BDU’s? The questions race through your mind as you approach him. You plot an intercept course and then go in for the strike. You: "Sir, we ask that you not step beyond the yellow line." Him: "What line?" You (Pointing to the yellow rope lying on the dead grass.): "This line right behind you, sr." Him (Seeing it.): "Mumble mumble hell mumble mumble camoflage rope mumble mumble". He reluctantly walks back to where the rest of the observers have been corralled. Your mission is successful; another one for the books. With no one standing behind them. And, just maybe, he would decide that its better to stay back. Unfortunately, people don’t seem to posses that kind of intellect when their brains are focused on a hulking piece of metal that is making loud sounds and will eventually launch into the sky. You do indeed have your hands full. "With a little, HEY! A little, HEY! A little Rock & Roll!" After a while you’ve seen a great percentage of the airshow; you know the aerobatic routines by heart; blowing bubbles has become a prime source of entertainment; and you have begun to take bets on how someone in your barracks will react to having her Angelina Jolie/Tomb Raider poster "artistically altered." You need to get out into the real world again! You need to regain your sanity and see that, yes, the Wisconsin accent really is as thick as the maple syrup your mom compares you to in the mornings! The vote is unanimous: a trip to Wal-Mart is in order! Actually, its more than just a trip to Wally World (As if anyone needs more entertainment than that!). Arty and Ed’s is where everyone goes for dinner. Its supposedly a bit of a tradition around Oshkosh. Not that I mind it, in fact I thought that place was the best thing since the obscenely over-priced McDonald’s where I grabbed a quick lunch while on Emergency Services duty. This place is a groovy 50’s-style drive in diner, complete with girls in mini-skirts and roller-skates. (Our young Cadet doesn't realize that 'groovy' is an expression particular to the 60's-70's psychadelic era and that 'cool' is probably a more appropriate 50's expression. - Ed)(Pauses while all of the gentlemen drool over their F-31’s) Personally, I was more interested in the food. Now, everyone raves about the root beer, and admittedly, it was good; but the onion rings were simply to die for! Delicious cannot even begin to describe them. But enough about that. We went to Wal-Mart afterwards where I bought a big ol’ bag of chocolate (it was gone in less than two days), and then went to the theater to see "Pirates of the Caribbean". All in all, it was a great night out with my flight, even if we weren’t in our se- beauteous BDU’s. "And a lotta, HEY! A lotta, HEY! A lotta heart & soul!"Now for the sentiments of one who thoroughly enjoyed herself: NBB was the highlight of my CAP career. Yea, it had its ups (tons of cool people and all the airshow I could ever want) and its downs (a disquieting instance of liquidy "scrambled" eggs). In the end, I didn’t particularly want to go home. I became sure of that fact at the Graduation Banquet as I stood with my flight to perform our original cadence before the whole encampment and proudly gave the command of execution: "But Daddy, I want a golden goose!" On my word, Echo Flight began a well-rehearsed and choreographed version of the "Oompa Loompa" song. I knew then that leaving would be the hardest thing I had ever done. *Sniff Sniff* Well, not really. And I’d have to say that getting Honor Flight was probably a more lasting memory than our Tony-worthy performance; but it was still awesome. Now I just have to figure out how to get them to take me for one more year... Author’s Note: the sub-headings this article are lines from the best cadence that I have ever marched to. Many thanks to the Echo Flight TACO for using it. |
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C/Capt. Z is a Habitual Lurker (two posts!) at Cadet Stuff... Nonetheless, she has all of the requisite credentials to write knowledgeable articles for them. The two most important being a full memorization of "You've Lost That Lovin' Feelin," and an uncanny ability to pacify Senior Members with contraband (read: Chocolate) at a certain NCSA. Her greatest accomplishment in the 'Patrol: blazing a trail in the research of Duct Tape's medical uses, specifically in the field of foot care. She is also an accomplished artist, her preferred medium being (other people's) movie posters.